I guess I will start off with how this blog got started. It started with this time magazine picture:
7 ATTACHMENT TOOLS: THE BABY B'S
1. Birth bonding
2. Breastfeeding
3. Babywearing
4. Bedding close to baby
5. Belief in the language value of your baby's cry
6. Beware of baby trainers
7. Balance
If you are not sure what any of these 7 "B"'s stand for you can easily google them. I believe these 7 steps can be followed to a certain degree in any situation, a single mom, a single dad (Breastfeeding simple means that when he feeds the baby he holds him close to his chest not in a baby swing propped up with a bottle.....pet peeve of mine), or a working parent.
Number 5 and 6 drive me up the wall the most, I recently was talking to a friend who said someone taught her the "cry it out method" I thought I was going to lose it :) I came home and called my husband I was so disguised! Who lets their baby cry it out, how sad! I hate when my baby's cry let alone on purpose! While my husband and I lay on the sofa and watch a movie! Sorry.....this drives me nuts!
I do not understand why everyone is all upset about attachment parenting it is a loving style of parenting and if a family chose to do this style of parenting we should be supportive, loving and respectful.
I think these tools are great for when the baby is young but lets carry this on to older years. What about involved parenting when you have a school age child. How many of us parents are excited or feel done when school starts? Well I don't! I do not like when school starts, sure homeschool is an option but I personally do not feel it is right for my child currently, but maybe someday. Time and Place for everything in life.
Though I choose to send my daughter to school (way to go homeschooling moms, huge credit to all you out there!) I stay involved with her education and work with the teacher and school to help her learn the best she can. I am involoved in the school PTO, I go have lunch with her regularly, I know who her friends are, I ask all about her day, what made her happy or sad, I write her noted in her folders, and lunch box, I have open communication with her teacher if I have a problem, I do not put her on a bus so we can talk to and from school, I work in the office (with my 2 other kids on my hip) making copies, I go on field trips, and award assemblys. I am INVOLVED!
The key to parenting is INVOLVEMENT at all levels and stages! Let your kids know you LOVE them!
I also HATE that cover. Breastfeeding is supposed to be a warm, nurturing thing. This cover is taunting, cold, and it does nothing to encourage a positive feeling toward breastfeeding or extended breastfeeding. And the title itself implies that anyone who doesn't breastfeed, or who BF's 'only' 6 weeks, 6 months, 1 year, etc, is LESS of a mom than anyone else. It just encourages competition among us. Hate it!
ReplyDeleteI just wanted to comment on one thing. You mentioned, we "should be supportive, loving and respectful" of attachment parenting. You’re right, but shouldn't we be that way toward ALL parenting styles--assuming the child isn't being abused or neglected? Let me preface this by saying that we don't do "cry it out" either (at least not as babies—preschooler/toddler tantrums are another story); BUT I know parents who do, and they are in no way neglecting their baby. They are loving parents who value a schedule and want to teach their children to sooth themselves. They always assure all of their baby’s needs are met before they let them cry, and most of them do not do CIO until the baby is older (and they are obviously crying for no other reason than just being tired. You get to know your children’s cries, and you know when they are tired). My parents did CIO with 5 kids. It was ‘the norm’ back then. And we are all happy and well-adjusted adults now. We know our parents love us because they had plenty of time to show us when it wasn’t ‘sleep time’. I think that the problem lies when we as parents start judging others for their parenting styles. There are so many different ways of parenting, and I don’t think it’s as black and white as many make it out to be. There is a lot of gray area.